How am I suppose to smile when I am obviously faking it.?Feelings comes and go.But this time I feel as if this feeling had leaved a scratch deep in my heart. And the scar was too big to be wounded.I had turned to so many friends, but still it can't vanish those feelings that I hate to bear.I laugh so many times to tell the world that I am okay.I smile just to let those people that I really care that I am okay and there is nothing to worry about. But until when?All this while I feel like as if I am lying to myself about myself.I am denying the real me.But I have to live like that everyday.Because I care.
There are so many tales that I need to tell my friends. But I opt not to.Because I learn to deal things myself.Not that I refuse to share.It just me.Sometimes I think it is too private to have all my things revealed.But of course I am the person that have less secret in the world.Because the people that I mingle with is the person that I trust the most.There is no secret in my world.Plus, we have our own term called public secret.Means that a secret that is shared among the member in our circle.Sound interesting?Yes it is.And you should be envy of our circle because we have our public secret, and you don't..oink3.
Woke up early this morning and I planned to do a few typing things with my FYP after had a little refreshment with my housemate.They had their first sahur this morning.That's why it a little hoo-haa this morning. Because everybody are so excited except for Yusrie.LAHA.He don't even woke up.Waited the clock to strike 6am,I continued my sleep.And the next time I woke up it was already 843am.Holy crap.And I missed the Lab again.This is the 4th time I missed the exact class.Continued my sleep until 1230pm.It feels so nice to have such a long sleep.After that,I open the memo and one memo attrack me.It was from En.Yahaya.It either asked me to drop the subject or I would not be permitted to sit for the final exam.Without thinking twice,or not even thought of anything I just apply to drop the subject.
Now.
What on earth is am I doing now?What have I done to my life?to my future?I just don't know.I have no idea on what am I doing by now.Everything just not make sense to me.And I feel like falling apart.God,what is this?I just did something and I am too afraid to bear the consequences. Am I irressponsible.Do I really have to do that?I am really don't know what is happening to myself.GILO.
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!